By Aaron Pomerantz & Yuval Weiss
Last Updated 5/15/2018 at 10:30 PM
Jerusalem, Crave Gourmet Street Food: With tensions high following yesterday’s opening of the U.S. Embassy in Jerusalem, experts are bracing for a serious escalation. That’s right: a whole bunch of articles, posts, and Blog entries by Times of Israel editor/author Sarah Tuttle-Singer. And Can I Just Tell You? Things are about to get real. The Daily Freier spoke with multiple sources on and off the record to find out just what the heck is about to happen.
“I know that Turkey recalled its Ambassadors to the United States and Israel yesterday, and I guess that’s kind of important.” stated a Western European Ambassador posted in Tel Aviv. “But what if Sarah writes an article tomorrow where she sips spiced wine and discusses the Occupation with two Lesbian settlers and a Christian Arab clockmaker on a rooftop in the Armenian Quarter at 3 AM. Then what, huh? ”
Others were equally pessimistic, including an unnamed official from the Jewish Agency. “What if she gets together with a Slovakian backpacker with A-MA-ZING cheekbones and an Imam from Nazareth who tells risqué jokes in Yiddish…. and they decide to solve the worlds problems over a pack of Marlboro Lites? We’re simply not prepared.”
“I hear she’s been illegally stockpiling Laphroaig Anecdotes in contravention to Established Treaties.” whispered a U.N Peacekeeper at Mike’s Place while on R&R from his base in the Golan. “And you never know when she will decide to use them.”
Yet despite feelings of angst throughout the City, there were others who seemed more optimistic. “I’m pretty relaxed about the whole thing.” noted The Gay Mizrahi Truck Driver Who Always Sells The Best Pomegranates.
Dont underestimate this person. While unproven, I think its fairly obvious she’s funded “asset”. Literally everything this person says is a meditated attempt at undermining the security of Israel. Her lame anecdotal stories are her attempt at building her fanbase and “personal brand”. Her politics are predictable Hillaryism that attempts to reach women and minority groups by “empowering” them and in the process destroy the nation. Her style is an ineffective and incredibly annoying attempt at appearing non threatening ie. “Oh btw…”.
She has connections at facebook too. Got me banned twice last time for asking “dont they kill trannies in gaza?”.
Shes a seditious bitch, not a joke.
I heard she was planning a major airdrop of Vibrators over Ramallah to help liberate Illegal Arab settlers from the repressive Israel government….. right after her little wanna be stand over man Corey Yoghurt gives them a test run….