By Yuval Weiss
Last Updated 5/16/2021 at 9:30 AM
Gaza: Tragedy struck the Gaza Strip yesterday as Israel destroyed a giant tunnel complex, trapping many Hamas fighters in the rubble. Yet this crisis has been compounded with news that three of Democratic Congresswoman Ilhan Omar’s brothers and/or ex-husbands are among the missing. We’re not 100% sure. You see, with the Honorable Ms. Omar, the whole “husband” or “brother” title often gets lost in the weeds. Ms. Omar has a history of saying some not so nice things to say about the Jooz, but that didn’t stop us at the Daily Freier from showing up at the press conference in solidarity with her missing Brusbands.
“Israel has hypnotized the world, may Allah awaken the people and help them see the evil doings of Israel.” Congresswoman Omar sta…..Wait, sorry! She really really said this once! Sorry folks, running satire pieces about these people is harder than you think.
Anyhoo, where were we? Oh yeah, so Ms. Omar was asked about why the United States continued to support Israel and she replied “It’s all about the Benjamins.” which was…. wait what? She actually said this in real life? OK we quit.
So yeah, we tried to write this story but it got away from us. Tune in next week when Ilhan accidentally sings “Khaybar Khaybar Ya Yahood” on a hot mike and Peter Beinart puts it in context for us.
UPDATE: While credible reports place Roger Waters in the same tunnel complex, he is not currently a husband and/or brother of Congresswoman Omar. We think.
Russian Press Condemns Israel. Israel has yet to commit ground troops to Gaza.
UN chief ‘deeply disturbed’ by civilian casualties & IDF bombing of Gaza media building. Eva Bartlett, a Canadian independent journalist and activist declares: “The destruction of two important Gaza buildings housing 20 media outlets was both shocking and predictable.” According to her unbiased speculations, this Arabist declares the purpose and intent of bringing down these two buildings – “Israel is deliberately obliterating media buildings in Gaza to cover up the war crimes that will follow.” However, this Arabist concedes the key point that Israel gave the inhabitants of in both buildings both warning and time to evacuate the premises to avoid civilian casualties. Interesting Gaza leadership has fired thousands of missiles at Israeli populated cities, has never given any warning what so ever … but Israel, (that Pariah State), will in the future, commit war crime atrocities!
An Israeli military spokesman told the media that the tower was targeted because it housed “Hamas military intelligence.” Hamas uses “civilian media” as “human shields,” the IDF also said in a statement on Twitter. The Palestinian militant group “deliberately places its military assets in the heart of the civilian population in the Gaza Strip,” the post added. Yet the Russian Arabist Press gave priority to Eva Bartlett’s evil eye of the Jewish State’s response to stateless Arab refugees firing missiles into Jerusalem, Tel Aviv and targeting, with their missiles, most of the populated cities across Israel – Israel, that tiny speck of a country. The Arabist Russian Press Head Lines: Israeli airstrike levels Gaza tower housing AP, Al Jazeera & other international media.
Clearly foreign imperialist governments seek to promote their agenda: to divide the tiny Jewish state. Jesus son of Zeus once taught: (divide and conquer), a nation divided against itself cannot stand. These foreign jackal nations, in all their innocence and piety, seek to promote Civil War within Israel. It means nothing to these hostile powers, who dub themselves – ‘the Quartet’, that 57 Arab and Muslim countries cover the Middle East, Africa and the former Soviet Union empire.
No they demand that Israel, about the size of New Jersey, MUST surrender the miraculous victory of the 1967 Six Day War. That only then can peace bless the Middle East! Interesting, Arab control of these recaptured territories which Israel reconquered, prior to that short war, Egypt, Jordan, Syria, Lebanon, Iraq, and Saudi Arabia fought 2 previous wars against Israel – with the objective – to obliterate the Jewish state. President of Egypt, Nasser, promised prior to the June war of ’67, that Arabs would in this war accomplish what they failed to achieve in 1948, to throw the Jews into the Sea, and thereby complete the Nazi Holocaust.