Tag: #AntiZionistNotAntiSemitic

Haaretz

Caught! Hitler Found Hiding in the Haaretz Online Comments Section
“Drag their ass, Kween!”

By Yuval Weiss

Last Updated 18 December 2025 at 3:15 PM

Tel Aviv: At long last, the world’s most infamous war criminal is behind bars. Adolf Hitler was caught early this morning hiding in plain sight: within the comments section of the Haaretz Online English Edition. Nobody knows just how long the Austrian Corporal was hiding there as his behavior did not arouse any suspicion and he was able to easily blend in with his environment. You see, the Haaretz Comments Section is quite the Rogue’s Gallery: a mix of bad faith Eurotrash who “only have a problem with Zionists”, Arabs saying the foulest crap while reminding you that they are Semites and thus incapable of Anti-Semitism, and a guy with a profile picture of Reinhard Heydrich who “has some questions” about the Holocaust.  The whole thing is made weirder by the fact that Haaretz Hebrew print edition is reliably Leftist but not completely insane (OK, ALMOST completely insane) and is read by as many as 700 people who all live within 3 blocks of Sheinkin Street in Tel Aviv. 

Hitler himself was rather relaxed about the whole affair. Looking much younger than his 136 years (which the Former Fuhrer credited to his vegetarian diet, daily walks, and some hot yoga), Adolf noted stated that he spent the last 8 years hiding next to a story about a Jewish family who died in a Jerusalem house fire that garnered 150 “laughing” emojis. Hitler was not shy about sharing his opinions about Haaretz online, noting that while its Middle East coverage was “fairly even-handed“, columnist Gideon Levy struck him as “a little crazy“. Hitler vowed to keep in touch with some of the people he met while hiding in the comments section, to include “ZyklonHeiler“, “StopZios1948” and “Candace Owens“.

When asked how he would spend his time in prison, Hitler stated that he was recently asked to be an informal campaign advisor by “a promising new leader in the State of Maine“.

The Jooz

Checkmate: Michael Moore says Protesters can’t be Anti-Semitic ‘because Palestinians are Semites’

By Yuval Weiss

Last Updated 1 May 2024 at 4:45 PM

Atlanta: Yesterday noted filmmaker/pundit/author/dick Michael Moore stopped the Pro-Israel movement dead in its tracks with one brilliant quip. While discussing the ongoing Campus Illegal Occupation Protests on CNN, Moore told Kaitlan Collins that the Campus Protesters can’t possibly be Anti-Semitic because…. and you may want to sit down for this Verbal Judo Move…. the Palestinians are Semites. Yes that’s right, a term invented by 19th Century German politician Wilhelm Marr to specifically describe his pseudo-scientific hatred of Jews now applies to Palestinians. Because reasons. Advocates for Israel were quick to surrender to Mr. Moore’s highly original thesis.

“I cannot counter this brand new argument that I have never heard until today.” lamented a despondent David Lange. “I was going to try to argue that Bernard Lewis destroyed this concept in the 1970’s. But who are you going to believe, some nobody who taught Islamic History for 50 years at Princeton or the Artistic Genius who directed Sicko?”

“My Life’s work is meaningless.” noted a mournful Brian of London. “So many years of advocacy were destroyed today by this brilliant logical truism that…. and I can’t stress this point enough… was never advanced by anybody until Michael Moore did so today.”

Yet not everyone in the Pro-Israel Community was convinced. “OK that’s the dumbest thing I’ve heard in weeks.” chortled Canadian Metis activist Ryan Bellerose. “I wonder which one of his 9 houses that this Man of the People was staying in when he did the interview.“

In other news, Israel is under intense media scrutiny after published reports accused the IDF of forcing Hamas detainees to watch ‘Bowling for Columbine‘ and then write a short movie review.

Israellycool, The Jooz, Tikkun Olam

As a Lefty Jew, How Do I Feel About Farrakhan? Hey Look! A Squirrel!

As a Progressive Jew, Am I Okay with Farrakhan’s speeches where he says that Jews are “Satanic”? Can we change the subject? Because to be honest, I would rather talk about something that doesn’t challenge my worldview. How about right-wing antisemitism? Wouldn’t you rather talk about right-wing antisemitism? That’s much more interesting than Linda Sarsour and Tamika Mallory defending Farrakhan.

(The Daily Freier is published on Israellycool today. Check us out!)

BDS, Jeremy Corbyn, Labour Party, The Jooz

Labour MP angry she wasn’t invited into Corbyn’s secret anti-Jewish Facebook group

 By Yuval Weiss

Last Updated 3/13/2018 at 6:00 PM

Camden, London: Today a very irate Labour Activist is demanding to know why she wasn’t invited to join Jeremy Corbyn’s secret Anti-Semitic Facebook Group “Palestine Live”. An  investigation by David Collier uncovered that the Secret Facebook Group “trafficked in anti-Semitic conspiracy theories, posted articles by Neo-Nazis, denied Israel’s right to exist, and called pro-Israel Jews “Zio-Nazis.” The group included Holocaust Denier Paul Eisen, as well as “the Jew who was too Anti-Semitic for the BDS Movement” Gilad Atzmon. And in a revelation that shocked people who still believe in the Tooth Fairy, the head of Breaking the Silence was also a member of the group…..Well rest assured, Labour Member of Parliament Danielle Lynne-Stephens is quite upset and wants to know why she never received an invite. The Daily Freier stopped by Momentum Headquarters in London to meet up with MP Lynne-Stephens  and have a little chat.

“I really didn’t want to ‘Go There’, but I can’t help but think there is a bit of sexism in the BDS Community. Honestly, sometimes it feels like the Anti-Israel Left has a Glass Ceiling. I mean, how else to explain why I wasn’t asked to join Palestine Live? I’ve paid my dues. The mob that attacked the Israeli Club at King’s College? I was there……I own 12 keffiyehs….. The Women’s Boat to Gaza? I was First Mate. I mean, until we got lost.….”

Danielle went on to explain just how unfair her exclusion from the group was. “How many times do I need to talk about the Rothschilds before I get an invite? And the sad part is, I could have really helped them with the quality of their memes……Like, they passed around pictures of hook-nosed Jews with demonic eyes? Big Deal. For a month my profile picture was a giant octopus with a big nose and a Star of David!”“I’m sorry, but my obsessive hatred of Israel takes a back seat to nobody in that group. Posting articles by David Duke? Hellooooo? David Duke once posted an article written by me!….Saying that 9/11 was an Israeli False-Flag operation? Please. I’ve been saying it since the days of dial-up Internet.”

“It just isn’t fair.” Danielle continued. “How many times do I have to use the word “Zio” before I start getting the respect I deserve? And don’t tell me Corbyn didn’t know I wasn’t in the group. He commented and ‘Liked’ posts all the time! I’m tempted to take a walk over to Jeremy’s gardening allotment and give him a piece of my mind.”

For his part, Mr. Corbyn says he denounces anti-Semitism in all its forms and has launched a committee to look into any wrong-doing by Labour MP’s. The Committee will be led by Ken Livingstone, Jackie Walker, and George Galloway.