It is the time of year where we pause to commemorate the campaign of War Crimes and Dispossession against the Ancient Egyptian People that some refer to as “Passover.” Now many years ago, a group of Rootless Cosmopolitans known as the “Israelites” decamped to the Nile Delta, a region that my friends in the Muslim Brotherhood say is quite lovely. At first the Egyptians showed the traditional generous hospitality that I can only hope to emulate when I have the precious opportunity to offer Raed Salah tea on the House of Commons Terrace.
Last Updated 3/13/2018 at 6:00 PM
Camden, London: Today a very irate Labour Activist is demanding to know why she wasn’t invited to join Jeremy Corbyn’s secret Anti-Semitic Facebook Group “Palestine Live”. An investigation by David Collier uncovered that the Secret Facebook Group “trafficked in anti-Semitic conspiracy theories, posted articles by Neo-Nazis, denied Israel’s right to exist, and called pro-Israel Jews “Zio-Nazis.” The group included Holocaust Denier Paul Eisen, as well as “the Jew who was too Anti-Semitic for the BDS Movement” Gilad Atzmon. And in a revelation that shocked people who still believe in the Tooth Fairy, the head of Breaking the Silence was also a member of the group…..Well rest assured, Labour Member of Parliament Danielle Lynne-Stephens is quite upset and wants to know why she never received an invite. The Daily Freier stopped by Momentum Headquarters in London to meet up with MP Lynne-Stephens and have a little chat.
“I really didn’t want to ‘Go There’, but I can’t help but think there is a bit of sexism in the BDS Community. Honestly, sometimes it feels like the Anti-Israel Left has a Glass Ceiling. I mean, how else to explain why I wasn’t asked to join Palestine Live? I’ve paid my dues. The mob that attacked the Israeli Club at King’s College? I was there……I own 12 keffiyehs….. The Women’s Boat to Gaza? I was First Mate. I mean, until we got lost.….”
Danielle went on to explain just how unfair her exclusion from the group was. “How many times do I need to talk about the Rothschilds before I get an invite? And the sad part is, I could have really helped them with the quality of their memes……Like, they passed around pictures of hook-nosed Jews with demonic eyes? Big Deal. For a month my profile picture was a giant octopus with a big nose and a Star of David!”“I’m sorry, but my obsessive hatred of Israel takes a back seat to nobody in that group. Posting articles by David Duke? Hellooooo? David Duke once posted an article written by me!….Saying that 9/11 was an Israeli False-Flag operation? Please. I’ve been saying it since the days of dial-up Internet.”
“It just isn’t fair.” Danielle continued. “How many times do I have to use the word “Zio” before I start getting the respect I deserve? And don’t tell me Corbyn didn’t know I wasn’t in the group. He commented and ‘Liked’ posts all the time! I’m tempted to take a walk over to Jeremy’s gardening allotment and give him a piece of my mind.”
For his part, Mr. Corbyn says he denounces anti-Semitism in all its forms and has launched a committee to look into any wrong-doing by Labour MP’s. The Committee will be led by Ken Livingstone, Jackie Walker, and George Galloway.
Forty years ago, an ad-hoc troupe of Palestinian activists and Germans with a passion for Social Justice staged a direct-action work stoppage, temporarily disrupting and re-routing scheduled air transportation from Occupied Yafa Tel Aviv to Paris. This protest was not unlike how some of our more boisterous Trade Unionists might temporarily shut down the Bakerloo Line in an attempt to draw attention to the cutbacks enacted by today’s Neo-Thatcherite Government under Mr. Cameron.
The activists then took the passengers on an impromptu excursion to Uganda where they were hosted by a man I considered a friend, Idi Amin. Mr. Amin, who was in the midst of taking his country on a somewhat accelerated course toward true equality (with the unfortunate side effect of several hundred thousand deaths and the expulsion of the Indian minority), proved a gracious host. In order to better achieve a sense of Solidarity, the activists separated the passengers into “working groups“, to include “Jews and Israelis” and “Everyone Else“. In order to better focus the Collective toward the goal of reducing Palestinian incarceration rates, “Everyone Else” was sent home, allowing for a true emphasis on the interaction between the Social Justice activists and the “Jews and Israelis“.
Mr. Amin received his guests with the traditional hospitality that he was known for, and allowed everyone to camp out at the Entebbe Airport, not unlike the Occupy protests around St. Paul’s Cathedral in 2011, but somehow not as filthy. Unfortunately, for reasons not entirely known, Israel did not appreciate the gesture and planned to disrupt Mr. Amin’s Conclave. Instead of meeting with the Activists in the spirit of constructive dialogue, Israel went down a path that is all too familiar to those of us who care for Justice. The Israelis chose to violate the laws of an African State through an act of piracy. Incidentally, the man in charge was named “Netanyahu“. There are so many things that one could say about this gross violation of sovereignty, but I feel one must focus on the quite frankly racist Israeli action of disguising one of their soldiers as Mr. Amin.
Once again, Israel chose to go down the path of violence, missing a genuine opportunity to dialogue with those with whom it has disagreements. My friends in Hamas and Hezbollah could tell you more about this subject. If you will excuse me, I need to go. A MOMENTUM activist at a Labour Press Conference is about to harangue a female Jewish Labour MP until she leaves the room in tears and I need to be on hand in order to do nothing to help her.